I will never forget the first time I heard “Fix You” by Coldplay.
It was the day that my first boyfriend broke up with me. My older sister and I were driving in her car and she said she had a song for me, that she would sing to me through this band. She played it loud - just the way I like it…because I can feel the music resonating in my chest…in my heart.
I remember how the tears came suddenly and I thought my heart would explode.
And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can’t replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
When the song finished, we both sat stunned, my face streaked with tears. Chelsea apologized, and said, “I never realized how perfect those words were.”
And I don’t remember what my response was…but I remember the pain and hope I felt as we drove through Melbourne that day. And I remember agreeing that those lyrics really were perfect.
For a long time, I couldn’t listen to that song without crying. But seven years later, I hear it and I feel something stronger than the pain I felt that day. I feel hope.
I hear my sister calling out to me, letting me know I am not alone.
I hear the boy who broke my heart telling me I taught him about God.
I remember the nights my friends spent with me showing me how much they loved me.
I remember all the pain and all the mistakes and all of the struggles I’ve been through in my lifetime.
And I remember the healing.
And I have hope.
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you